Grief doesn't come in five stages

A short read

Before we start

This is about what research finds after a death, and about a model most people were taught. It is general information, not advice, and it is not a description of how anyone should be grieving. If grief is not lifting and daily life has stopped working, that is worth taking to a doctor rather than waiting out.

Sources

Kubler-Ross E (1969), On Death and Dying — the origin of the five stages, drawn from observing dying patients rather than the bereaved
Maciejewski PK et al. (2007), JAMA — tracking bereaved people over time; the stage sequence was not observed and yearning was the dominant experience
Bonanno GA and colleagues — longitudinal trajectory research on bereavement, finding that gradually easing distress is the common course
DSM-5-TR and ICD-11 — prolonged grief as a recognised condition for the minority in whom grief remains intense and disabling